Children at birth.

Homebirth and siblings .

As a privately practicing independent midwife in Wollongong, one of my favourite aspects of home birth is that it is a family affair.

If it is not the first baby being born, the involvement of siblings in the preparation for birth, the lead up to labour and welcoming their new baby earth side is such a wonderful learning experience and a special time that bonds the whole family, especially baby and sibling from well before baby is born.

The girls would greet me at the door screaming
 "Midwife is here!!!!"

The midwife and children develop quite the
bond of their own over months of antenatal care.

In this blog post i'd like to address a few commonly asked questions about siblings and children at birth.

1. How will they handle it?

2. Will the noises scare them?

These two are best answered together. The key here is in the preparation. As a client recently described to her friends who were concerned for her girls aged two and four watching the birth, "It's not like I just sat them in front of me and said, here watch this. The girls had months of lead up, checking the baby with the midwife each home visit, reading books and watching videos, setting up the birth space."

There are lots of age appropriate recourses to help in the preparation. One of my favourite books is Hello Baby by Jenni Overend. This book shows the home birth of a family, their midwife and the labour. It talks about the noises mummy will make and shows the baby being born.
ABC Homebirth is a great free e-book. Like these, there are many other books available, some only in e-reader format but a quick google search should produce plenty to work with.

As well as books, videos can be used to help prepare little ones for what they are about to see and hear when mummy is birthing. I would recommend mum or dad watch the videos before they are watched together.

The beautiful book Hello Baby
by Jenni Overend, Illustrated by Julie Vivas.

3. What age is best?

I believe homebirth is appropriate for all ages. I don't think you can be too young or too old; each age has different challenges and advantages.

0-2yrs - these little ones are usually oblivious to what is going on. I think it's really important to have a spare set of hands in another support person. While often this age group is clingy to mummy when labour is under way, they almost seem to sense something is going on and can be unusually content being entertained and cuddled by another care provider.

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2-4yrs - the attention span of these little ones matches their years in minutes. They'll seem captivated and inquisitive one minute and then be running away to the toybox the next. They'll have more interest in the Paw Patrol DVD they've watched a thousand times than the noises or the body that is coming out of mummy. Don't be surprised if that same attention span is displayed when they are introduced to their new brother or sister for the first time.

Big sister is captivated...
Little sister... has ice in a cup... enough said.

4-8yrs - intrigue and mystery. These guys are fascinated and don't want to miss a second of the action. Action being the important word here. Normal birth can be slow and boring so these guys will sometimes be drawn to their younger siblings Paw Patrol DVD with strict instructions to be summonsed when something interesting happens. They love the noises, they love the gross bits and feel the love as much as mum and dad when that little baby finally emerges. Most of all they love telling all their friends and family how the baby was born in a swimming pool in the lounge room and how mum pushed it out her vagina and there was blood and even a placenta. If they're lucky enough daddy will even pass the scissors when its time to cut the cord.

Beauty and normalcy of birth being
imprinted for life.

8-12yrs - boys will often fake apathy and disinterest but keeping themselves in ear and eyeshot so to make sure all is going smoothly. Girls at this age are all over it; mini-midwives who want to do it all. They're in there with the torch and mirror trying to spot the first glimpse of babies head. They're giving mum sips of water and ice, heating wheat bags and changing towels and pads.

12 + - this age, whether boys or girls, get the most out of the home birth experience. While they may not know it at the time, they are getting a serious education; mum is setting the finest example of having faith in ones body, trust in birth and how birth is just normal. I believe these concepts are being seeded in each age group, but it's this adolescent group that will have a firm grasp on what it's all about.

4. Will i wake them in the night?
You might... usually not, but you might. When little ones wake in the night to find the exciting happenings of labour and birth, they usually find it pretty anti-climatic and grow weary of it and fall back asleep or asked to be tucked back into bed. More often than not they'll sleep undisturbed and wake in the morning to catch the last bit of action or meet their new sibling.

5. Will they annoy me?
Probably just a little bit. I do think it is a good idea to have a back up plan incase you find your little ones presence too distracting, Grandma or someone else could pick them up for a sleepover or take them out for a play. Usually with the right support your midwife or doula can help keep your mind in focus and dad can tend to the child. Often mums are good at tuning that little pixie voice out and indulging guiltlessly in the surges and what ever she needs to do to get through. Ultimately its up to you and how you feel at the time.

One by one these guys all arose from their beds,
 the excitement was contagious.
"shhhh" says grandma, little giggles continued
to cheer their mum on from the side line. 

6. Who will look after them?
I would say at the majority of births I attend it's only mum and dad and myself present. Between the two of us, myself and dad manage pretty well. By the time birth comes around the children are very familiar with the midwife. the children and myself have built our own little relationship and they are quite comfortable sitting back with the midwife watching on or flicking through a story book.
Mum can anticipate how much support she may need so if she's predicting dad and midwife will be tied up helping her through each surge, having another person to be on child duty makes sense.

They all jumped for joy when they laid eyes
on their new little brother.

Having a private midwife, where your pregnancy is completely normalised and your care is carried out in your own home, is just one of the perks of home birth. Children exposed to this are so very lucky and I believe it's setting them up to make informed decisions about their bodies when it is time for them or their partners to birth. Whether they witness the birth or not is not important. The benefit is in the time spent together, learning, preparing, trusting and bonding.

Thank you mum.
You're my hero.

Until next time,

Louise x

This is how its supposed to be....

The most recent home birth I attended was the most humbling birth I've seen yet. It’s my wish that the norm for all mums is to birth in this way, especially first time mums like the mamma here in this post. All too often it takes a horrible, traumatic birthing experience for mums to wise to the system, learn of other options, learn how different it can be... how it’s supposed to be.

Mums like this new mother never cease to amaze me, and make me proud to have met them and, better, get to know them. This mamma trusted her body from the moment her pregnancy was realised; she grew a healthy girl inside and our midwife/client relationship flourished with honesty, trust and encouragement. Mamma was all-embracing of all that was to come with labour and birth and baby.

Jack the puppy watches on..

Baby Audrey decided to come earth side on her due date. Mamma was ready after her water broke two days earlier and finally it all came together on a lovely lazy Sunday. When mamma is in the right mindset, prepared without fear, the midwife’s job is an easy one. It’s a role of observer and I like to pick up the camera and become birth photographer. Other roles often ensue too; dish washer, clothes folder, bed maker... because when it’s like this, how it’s supposed to be... birth is quite boring. Beautiful, amazing and life changing, but, blissfully boring. 

Mamma progressed gently and steadily and soon baby Audrey arrived. This birth was textbook; when people ask how it went I reply that nothing could have gone better. Mamma was left well alone, she had this all along and it was let be... this is how it’s supposed to be.

Welcome to the world Audrey Storm, Thank you mum and dad for letting me be part your most wondrous day, early weeks with baby... life. 

Until next time...

Louise x


Louise David is a Private Midwife in Wollongong and The Illawarra areas. Louise provides all types of pregnancy, birth and postnatal care, including home birth and hospital birth support.
Louise is a International Board Certified Lactation consultant and offers private lactation consultation from her home in the Wollongong area.

Sunshine, cups of tea and yellow cards.

The forgotten world of private midwifery care.

Having a baby is the most special and anticipatory time of most people's lives. The care you receive in your pregnancy is of utmost importance. Knowing that you and your baby are in the safest of hands for your prenatal care is essential to rest easy at night.

I want to talk about today, something that is not well known and understood, and even not necessarily readily available, in our culture - private midwifery care. Having your own midwife who looks after you and your baby and guides you safely on your pregnancy journey and beyond.

Here are a few misconceptions about private midwifery care:

• It's alternative, or for hippies
• It's only for if you're having a home birth
• It's very expensive
• There's no health fund or medicare rebates
• If something goes wrong you don't have a doctor or hospital available

Let me clarify...

Private midwifery care is available as an option for every woman. It's a flexible model of care that can be adapted to suit every woman no matter what their health status and intended mode and place of birth.

With recent progress with medicare, private midwifery is now more available to more women. If your midwife is a medicare eligible midwife then your care is likely to attract a medicare rebate, with some midwives completely bulk billing all ante and post natal care, add to this some health fund rebates and private midwife care is now more affordable than ever.  

Finally, a midwife, even working in a private capacity, is part of a multidisciplinary team. If difficulties arise at any stage there is a smooth process of collaboration and referral with other care providers, be it your GP or local maternity unit. Your midwife and you work together to adapt your care to your changing needs. 

Private ob v Private midwife

similarities - 

one on one individualised care

differences - 

• wait time - your midwife comes to you and you're never waiting in busy, overbooked clinics

• you really get to know and trust each other 

• you form a team together - planning, discussing and choosing every step of the way. Not just the 'pilot guiding his ship' to quote an obstetrician I know.

• ob antenatal appointment 5-10 min, midwife 45-60+ min

• There is little need for prenatal classes with private midwife care as every midwife appointment is filled with little bits of information and education, it's a pregnancy worth of prenatal education sessions. We talk about the baby to be and the role it's being born into.

Your midwife comes to you.
You get to know and trust each other over many
 relaxed friendly antenatal appointments.

Trusting, relaxed, confidant - you're in safe hands.

this is going on in the background -
No need for babysitting or dragging bubs to boring,
long wait-it-out doctors appointments.

He's learning about becoming a big brother.

Care options...

Depending on your situation your care plan is tailored to suit.

In a normal, healthy, low risk pregnancy your care is taken on by the midwife and if any need arises she works together with the multidisciplinary team to support you in your care. This care is best suited to a home birth plan, but can also be adapted for hospital birth.

Midwife shared care is a great option to get the 'best of both worlds'. This is the same as the common GP shared care model with added perks: being in your own home, no wait time, private care continued postnatally.

This model works best for women who are planning to have their baby at hospital and also for women planning a home birth if there are minor complications in their pregnancy i.e. diet controlled GDM or history of complications in previous pregnancies.

The reason it works best for these cases is the women becomes familiar with the hospital, she books in, she sees the staff obstricitan and then carries on her care with her midwife with intermittent visits back to the hospital (at 30 weeks and then from 37wks). When time to birth arrives or transfer (in case of a home birth), the hospital and woman have a relationship and the transition of care is smooth and problem free.

Postnatal care...

Probably the best thing about private midwifery care is the relationship that has been fostered and grown in the pregnancy continues through the postpartum period. Your midwife you've come to know and trust visits you as needed in the postnatal period. Postnatal care continues into the 6th week postnatally. this care is usually included in the care package and is also eligible for medicare and private health rebates. 

Hannah and Andy enjoy the perks of private midwifery care.

If you are interested in private midwifery care in the Wollongong area and its surrounds don't hesitate to contact me by Email. Remember midwife care is a valid option for every woman and care can be tailored to suit your individual needs. Lastly, it's never too late to employ the services of a midwife, if you are unhappy with the care you are receiving this pregnancy (remember it's not just pregnancy, but birth and beyond) don't wait "until next time", take action, choose the care you deserve.

until next time, Louise x

Brown paper packages tied up with string.....

These are a few of my favourite things.....

About being a midwife at a home birth.

Not being welcomed at the door... 
tippy toeing in, following the sounds...finding this.

Estimating the progress of labour, 
just by being with and watching.

just waiting...
getting close now...
secretly wishing she births in this spot where the light is amazing!

Alas... 
back to the safety, warmth, comfort of the darkened birth pool.

that cord...

The relief, when all is done, from all involved....
The idea that bed is near....

Sneaking just one with the flash ;-)

Counting 10 and 10.

Saying goodnight, you were amazing x

What a joy and privilege to be present for this families birth of their new daughter. It was on the spur of the moment when their midwife fell ill and asked me to cover her as back up until she could be back with her clients.

Lucky for everyone their midwife came good, the family had two happy midwives present (one wielding the camera). 

Birthing at 3am poses some difficulty for the birth photographer, trying to maintain the calm and darkened birth environment without compromising the quality of the pics too much.

The birth photos here are quite fuzzy and grainy from the lack of light, but they still tell the picture here so beautifully.

Thank you to this family for welcoming me in to their home for their birth and to my friend and colleague Rachele Meridith for being a support and teacher.

Until next time,

Louise x